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Wednesday 1 June 2011

1st June -2nd day of 5th chemo cycle

Well, when i got home from the hospital yesterday, I was a bit of a zombie, nothing unusual there. I was dizzy and help on to things as I walked from room to room. This too is standard after chemo infusion, for me anyway.
Bed at 22.00 hrs. slept like a brick....up at 05.30, organised the chemo meds to be taken today.
Not feeling too bad so far, (07.30 hrs)

Anyway, whist bored to snores at the hospital yesterday, I decided to write a poem reflecting on my interesting journey so far.

Reflections




Here it is..........

My Personal Journey so far

I found a lump,
Small and sore.
Nothing for worries.
I've had them before.

To sit, stand and lay,
The thing hurt so much.
So, off to the Doctors 
For 'pain killing' stuff.

The Doctor, he looked,
He poked and he prodded.
"Go to the hospital!"
He looked a bit worried.

"The lump must be removed".
We think it's a cyst.
Biopsy approved.
Make sure nothing is missed."

A little time later,
A phone call I get.
"Come in on Friday,
To see me, my pet".

Friday is here.
To the hospital I trot.
"Sorry, my love,
"It's cancer you've got".

I must  have some Chemo,
Radiotherapy too.
28 days.
"This will effect you".

"You must have it done
To extend your life.
Stay being a Mother,
A sister, a daughter, a wife."

"If I go through all of this,
How long will I live?
Give me a clue,
How long do you give?"

"There's no way to tell
If the cancer will die,
Or if it is you,
 Summoned on high".

My family and medics say,
"Give it a try!
Give it a chance
So that you wont die!"

3 x 3 cycles of chemo is done.
28 days of radiotherapy,
So close to my bum!
I am so tired, so burnt and so sore! 

Please don't make me have any more!!!!!
I can't sleep, I can't walk,
I can't wee, for the pain!
I can't stand, I can't sit!
Oh - NEVER AGAIN!!

Chemo is fine,
Just makes you feel sick,
And dizzy and tired
And poorly, so quick.

Radiotherapy is hard, it's rot!
28 days, I took all on the trot!
Would I have it again?
Certainly NOT!

The pain at times
Caused so much grief!
I actually saw death 
As a welcome relief!

Now that it's over, 
I don't remember the pain,
But, I do know for sure
Not to have it again!

Another  3 x 3 cycles 
Of chemo to go.
How do I feel?
Well, I don't really know.

Chemo is better
Than your bum being burned.
But other STUFF comes with it,
This recently, I learned.

2 and a half cycles
Again, I've been through.
So, just wait and see,
That's all I can do!

Carol Hubbard 1st June 2011.


2 comments:

cleo said...

the only difference from what you got is the cancerspot, I have breastcancer and you have "bum" cancer, very awqward a spot..... the treatmets were about the same, but I had first 4x chemo, and then 25 days radiotherapy, all bad bad bad! I wanted to kill myself during the treatment, because I felt so sick and bad.. I wrote poem about the radiotherapy in my private site, its no www though..

Carol said...

Hi cleo,
Did you have more chemo after your 4 sessions before radiotherapy?
I had 3 chemo, 28 radiotherapy and another 3 chemo. Chemo a breeze compared to radio.........
I like having no hair though, may even continue to shave it all off, no brushing, hair gel, hair spray, mousse, and I can co-ordinate all of my head to my outfits.Cancer also taught me a lot about myself and my priorities, after all, the cemetery is full of indispensable people...so, if it isn't going to kill me or hurt anyone, I don't worry about it! Lol!