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Thursday, 16 June 2011

16th June - 17th day of 5th chemo cycle

All emotions riding high today!
Coming up to the last chemo session.........
I feel nervous, frightened, excited, happy, tearful, upset...(the not knowing if it worked or not and not knowing when I will know etc),   you name it and I feel it!

Had a bit of an 'upsurge' of energy this morning, probably connected with the above.....anyway, did some you do....bloody knackered now! Lol!....(And it's only 5 minutes to 10 in the morning!!!!!)

Now that the last session looms...I need to start thinking about my return to work, I will be discussing my options with HR, so that I can try and work out what is going to be best for me, when I see the oncologist, I will also discuss with her, and have a chat with my Doctor....try to see what's what in all of this.

One of the things that is a bit worrying, and it is my fault,.....when I know that I am seeing people, I get all dressed up, make up, add colour to a drained face, cream the body to eliminate the 'crocodile skin'...come on girls, you know what I mean....
So the comments that I get are,
'You look well!'.
'I can't believe how well you look under the circumstances...'
And all that stuff....
How I look and how I feel are continents apart sometimes!

Yes, I am as cheery as I can be on the family and friends read it, I don't want them to worry too much, after all, this affects their lives as well, there is nothing that they can do to make things better, why should I upset them any more that they are already?

I haven't posted pics of me on bad days for the same reasons. When I feel that the time is right, I will post those pics..........
Any way enough of that......

Today, I feel good, the side effects, tooth ache and other stuff is all manageable........Oh, by the way, Carole, (, suggested cloves for my toothache, I have used clove, but the taste....urgh....If the pain is unbearable, I will use it and clove oil, it does help with the pain.

Oh, blimey....I must be feeling better, Lol! I am off on a tangent again!

Sun is shining, coffee and garden calling, and I am answering,
'I am on my way!'

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